March 3, 2016
Blog III "The power of a resilient spirit..."
The number one question I get as a therapist is: "How can you hear stories of trauma, suffering or daily problems and not become depressed or overwhelmed yourself?" The inquiry is a very genuine question and I answer in kind. I'm definitely not a "robot", lacking empathy or emotion that mechanically applies methodology to each individual case in hopes of 'fixing' people... Most therapists are compassionate people that have a 'story' of what drew them into the field mental health. You don't go into the crux of people's personal turmoil without being fully persudaed that there is hope and believe that we are all equipped with a resilient spirit. A part of the therapeutic process for me is teaching people to discover their own resilience.
Resilience is defined as the ability to recover from difficulties and to 'bounce back' into shape. It is the mental toughness and awareness that regardless of where you are in the trajectory of your life, that "everything" is subject to change and that you have the capacity to recover. If I did not believe that everyone is endowed with a spirit of resilence then I could not and would not be in the field of mental health, but I am governed by the principle that people are resilient at their core. We can adjust, relearn and develop strengths that we thought impossible when the unimaginable occurs.
In the 1940's, Austrian neurologist and psychiatrist Dr. Victor Frankl was stripped of everything he loved and watched the devestation of suffering around him during the largest holocaust of all time. He wrote in his book "Man's search for meaning" that when a man has lost everything that he holds dear, the one thing that cannot be taken from him is the power to choose how to respond to his circumstance. Frankl lost his entire family saving his sister, and when finally released he used the adversity that he experienced to share hope and healing to the world. Dr. Frankl is the founder of logotherapy which emphasizes the idea that mankind is driven to find meaning and purpose in everything. Dr. Frankl demonstrated his resilience in not only surviving the horrors of the holocaust, but in identifying that you can find meaning and purpose in every aspect of your life.
If you think that resilience is only found in the extraordinary, superhumans that can handle the greatest feats with ease then you are mistaken. Resilience is in all of us; the single mother that is raising her children as best as she knows how...The young man that may be going through his second trial of chemotherapy... The father that works extremely long hours and is still struggling to make ends meet but has hope that things will get better. Resilience is in you too and can only be discovered when we go through life's greatest challenges. If you are struggling right now, please know that your hope for a better tommorow can give you strength for today.
Every season in life has to eventually change, it is a natural law of order. We all will experince both the bitter and the sweet of life in order to fully evolve as people. If you are currently in a Summer season in your life, enjoy and take the time to encourage someone that you love. If you are experiencing a wintery season, surround yourself around people and things that encourage you to do the next right thing. As a mental exercise, I encourage you to find stories of resilience that give you hope for your situation. Whatever you focus on whether negative or positive will become magnified in your life. The song below stories the life of Bryan Warneke, a 15 year old young man that has struggled with cystic fibrosis all of his life. Though he was given a life expectancy of age 36, he continues to beat all odds by daily living his life to the fullest and is the heart of resilience at it's core.
"To good health..."
~Fayola